On, we

.

travel, no
sense of direction or
song, condemning clouds
with ink
-y silence.

Smell the rain?

It has no single end
or rendering. List its
droplets as your scars.

We’ll wait, generate
weather channel wars
and the capitulate
-shun
of stars.

..
Wordled.


 

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4 Responses to On, we

  1. I hate it when I forget the song that was in my head when I first woke. It would be nice if I sailed back into it.

  2. “List its droplets as your scars” wow.
    Generate weather channel wars: hmm. I suppose this could be about our environment. “On, we travel” certainly that contributes a huge amount to our environmental woes. And yet there’s no stopping.
    On, we travel, – the way you’ve put it — as if there has been some deliberation and yet still, onward we go.

  3. cobalt girl says:

    I love the way you wove the title and first line together, flip-flopping “on” and “no.”

    “We travel no.” LOVE that. This makes me think of job-hunting, or doing anything else that ends in repeated rejection. Maybe trying to find a wife, or pursuing a certain girl who always says “I love you as a friend.”

    “condemning clouds with inky silence” … That is gorgeous. Who on earth would condemn clouds? Someone who’s so ticked off at life that they’re even mad at the innocent clouds. And how do they express their feelings? By NOT writing. I really like this part.

    “no single end or rendering” … Fantastic, in sound and meaning. This person is determined not to end up single. At the same time, the silence will continue; he will not allow his truth, his story, to be expressed or presented to the world.

    He will, however, hide it between the lines (and in the line breaks): “List its sore rendering.”

    Love “capitulate shun of stars.” 🙂 I think this is great, being angry at the sky. Maybe even God, but pretending you’re just shaking your fists at the sky.

    “On we” sounds like “ornery.”

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