Alice, in (Daisy) Chains

alice prompt

He loves me, loves me
knot.
Alice is all tied up
right now, a giant in her
own skin, terribly white
-rabbit late and ready to
trade this cake for tarts.

She’s in love with a cat
-erpillar; have you met
him? He’s smokin’ some
-thin’, frozen in his own
wonder. The Queen’ll
have her head for this
bright crush, but she’s
in a rush to see if this
grim grin is for real.

Drink me, says the cup
of her own tears, some
saltwater tonic she might
use to form the words
I am over you, had he
not so many legs, or
lashes.

Petals fall. Thou
-sands, in all. See
them flutter in the
tweed
-led breeze?
(A rooster crows.)

She’s asked the trees for
a reprieve, but they’ve
got their own holes to
fall down into. He loves me

(Has she lost her
muchness?)

not. She’s tiny now. How,
she does not know, but
land ho to the pirate who
finds her here, who whisks
her off instead to some
happily ever
(never)
………….
land.

 

..
wicked cool prompt over at pinkgirlink.

 

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14 Responses to Alice, in (Daisy) Chains

  1. Misky says:

    Completely enchanting, De.

  2. drnurit says:

    So very lovely, De…

  3. Miss Stacy says:

    astounding play on words! you literally had me hanging on those line breaks. the tonic of tears, and poor alice…hopefully she finds her way back to herself (or at least that land of ever happy)!

    i’m delighted to have you for this weeks prompt! 🙂

    stacy
    http://warningthestars.blogspot.com/

  4. DELL CLOVER says:

    Fabulous poem–I especially like the “Drink me” lines. My fave book from childhood, read it over and over and over.

  5. berri myst says:

    “See
    them flutter in the
    tweed
    -led breeze?”

    Ha! This cracked me up.

    I love your poem title! I know you threw in the daisy chains for me. 🙂

    • berri myst says:

      “ready to
      trade this cake for tarts” Hee hee. A few meanings in this, methinks. I love the way you embed all kinds of underlying meanings, like that her skin is too pale and that she feels overweight. She feels even fatter because her love is not, as far as she perceives.

      “The Queen’ll
      have her head for this
      bright crush, but she’s
      in a rush to see if this
      grim grin is for real.” I do love that Cheshire cat.

      “had he
      not so many legs, or
      lashes” So pretty. The writing, I mean. (Double meaning in “lashes” of course.)

      “Thou petals fall. Sea-sand in all.” Gorgeous.

      “they’ve
      got their own holes to
      fall down into” Love this.

      I really like the way you conveyed her emotions as she is twisted up by this man. First, he makes her feel like she’s huge (in importance). Then, when he loses interest, she shrinks.

      The ending is really very clever:

      “her off instead to some
      happily ever
      (never)
      ………….land”

      First of all, you’re saying the pirate will whisk her OFF, off somewhere. Her off-ness. Her strangeness. Her most unique features. Rather than running from her idiosyncrasies, the pirate will embrace them. I love that you made him Captain Hook. The poor dude needs some love too; he’s totally misunderstood. Peter Pan is a dork. 😛 But also, you weren’t just referencing Neverland. You were saying that the pirate ship would never land; you’re hoping Alice will be at sea forever, because really, that’s where her heart is. Ooh, maybe Alice is half-mermaid!

  6. mannixk says:

    This is awesome, De.

  7. tsdwords says:

    Wicked cool poem too! Swish!! I fell happily down that rabbit hole 🙂

  8. Ditto to berri myst! I love the thing about “if he didn’t have so many legs” — isn’t that just like infatuation – to focus on the physical? Yes, it is.
    I just love this one!

  9. coalblack says:

    It’s hard to be a single gal these days! Loved the word play.

    rowwwr

  10. Mr. Walker says:

    Oh, dare I say “wonderful” – playful and fun!

  11. Susan says:

    What a vision! Most probable and life like. My favorite phrase is the Tweedled–tweed led breeze. I assume there are no gender/species limitations on the knight of never never land?

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