Aubade from a Glass House

..

The breeze is caught,
a distant hymn.
The moon she’s got
is growing dim.
She pulls the shade
and so it goes –
her heart a glade
where river flows.
He’s hidden lies
under each stone,
but her silence dies
with each clock tone.

And when she glances back to lawn,
the lying, cheating bastard’s gone.
 

 

..

Written for Toads

 

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23 Responses to Aubade from a Glass House

  1. This made me laugh so much! I love how it starts out so vividly beautiful and then Bam! You let em have it!

  2. Ah.. what a great little narrative here.. there final couplet really tying it all together. 🙂 Indeed the hymn worked better than him here.. 🙂

  3. Sanaa Rizvi says:

    her heart a glade
    where river flows.

    These lines are beautiful 😀 loved your take on this prompt! 🙂

  4. lolamouse says:

    I think we must have been on the same wavelength when writing our poems! Hmmm…

  5. Susan says:

    Haha! It’s better that way!

  6. Well, the title makes me think she’s got something up her sleeve! Love that final couplet – the beginning really flows well, too!

  7. Perfection, De…you made this look SO easy. Poem magic!!

  8. Marie Elena says:

    Wow.
    Wow.
    Wow….

  9. ManicDdaily says:

    Oh dear! Well, better off without him, I think. Thanks, WhimsyGizmo. k.

  10. Candy says:

    Wow from me too!

  11. Isadora Gruye says:

    I really liked the shortened lines (they made the rhyming more tempered), and I love the narrative. Too fun! Well done and Viva la

  12. Snakypoet (Rosemary Nissen-Wade) says:

    Well, that’s a new take on the aubade! 😀 I love it.

  13. Kerry O'Connor says:

    I was very intrigued to see your response to the challenge, given the brevity of your usual style. This is awesome – each word hits the spot without any sense of forced awkwardness. (And I am amused to see we both used ‘So it goes’ – a Vonnegut fave of mine).

  14. hedgewitch says:

    Good riddance. Great cadence. Couldn’t agree more, and excellent work with the end-rhymes.

  15. coalblack says:

    Isn’t that always the way?

    You cheated. I’m telling.

    meowwrrrr

  16. Helen says:

    I so enjoy your style!!

  17. Sherry Marr says:

    “Her heart a glade where river flows” – all the more sweetly now he’s gone, LOL.

  18. Debi says:

    Yes, Sherry said it well.

  19. margaret says:

    Succinct and yet it says so much. Loved this – what a great effort.

  20. Kir Piccini says:

    “her heart a glade” …I love thinking of that, that our insides are a lovely expanse.

  21. ZQ says:

    Haha Thanks for my Monday Smile

  22. M says:

    damn I love this ~

  23. jinksy says:

    And another one bites the dust!

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