1991



It was trying; you were
trying
(to kill me, slowly)
(to fill me, flow me
with a rage that should
have lasted decades.)

Fractured promises and tables,
hidden movie tickets, the smell of weed
and sin. The thin crimson
line between doubting my
-self and seeing you; the long slow
ache of knowing your truth.

I wished upon broken
fallen stars, scattered useless
dandelion
(he loves me. not.)
fluff. Made vows. Everything

we used to be
is burned into my brain,
birthday candles placed
by other hands, the smooth
-ing of ivory icing over endless crumbs.

Even the ocean became
a bruise, purple-blue and spreading.
The dreading of winter. The thaw
that revealed more than I could
ever want to see. Angle it

now, the shattered how and the
quiet why
of all we could not be;
the dying (and rebirth) of me.

I believed every lie
you ever told.

Your soul an ever
-shifting sand.
My heart: a stone.

..

..
Awesome process poem offered over at PinkGirlInk.
Head over and read the process, and write a poem of your own. 

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7 Responses to 1991

  1. Well, I hope the “I believed every lie/ you ever told” was the lie! However, I can see how it might be the truth as well. I love the dandelion as an image – trying to count the petals and having it all turn to fluff. I could see those birthday candles and the icing smoothed over the insides of your brain – as if a whole year (or years) are just smoothed over, gone, the crumbs falling into the crevices. I’m glad you got out of that one – yuck. But a great poem!

  2. The ocean becoming a bruise.. and the not wanting thaw because of what’s hidden underneath.. that is not a pleasant moment. 1991 was an interesting year.. somehow the year I grew up.

  3. I got to this late but love Stacy’s guided prompts. How do you do it with so few words (and such concise, lovely words)? You are amazing and so is this poem.

  4. Shawna says:

    This is fantastic. Every word. Every line break and circular line (like “… endless crumb-sing”). So, so, so good.

    “the smell of we’d” … Very clever.

    Did you just invent the sea-angel? I LOVE this variation of a mermaid. It’s a fallen angel who landed in the ocean, I think.

  5. Miss Stacy says:

    amazing!
    you work magic with those guided prompts.
    i would totally love to showcase you on the blog one day. 🙂
    yes, that is a submission solicitation. heh.
    really, i loved this.

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