sugar, spun


she is flung,
and gossamer
-gone. paint

her rasp
-berry bubble
gum pink, drink
her poured

over ice,
shaken slight,


A Twitter poem for Mama Zen’s Words Count prompt, a play it again toads.

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7 Responses to sugar, spun

  1. Love the tone and structure… the way the poem moves like a dance…

  2. I feel a seductress, feline approaching. Love the line breaks so much

  3. hedgewitch says:

    As Bjorn says–great enjambment–also, for me, great imagery. The first line reels one in and the poem never falters. You have shown us one of the real pieces of craft with short poetry here, to never waste a word, to make each one integrally support the idea.

  4. Jim says:

    I liked your choice of words, De. The only gossamer I remembered was the famous round-the-world glider, the Gossamer. So, now, I have gossamer pearly white hair, an alluring raspy voice, with an icy cold stare on my continence. Thanks.

  5. Kerry O'Connor says:

    Very nicely done. You lose none of your characteristic word play and phrasing in favour of the limited number of characters.

  6. ManicDdaily says:

    Sounds pretty great to me! k.

  7. Love those line breaks! This is seductive.

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