Do Re Mi

When I ask that pulled moon to stay,
in her indigo dress she sits
her impish spirit set to play.
I crinkle-gather all my wits

about my fractured self in fits,
a tumble-crumbled comedy.
And through the rumbled sky she flits,
spinning tales of blue tragedy.

She’s a wonder-wandering eye,
blinking brood and comet-whip smart.
She casts her spell; I dance and cry,
and press her presence to my heart.

And with a muggle-muddled moan
I present my own sky: a stone.

..
A ’bouts rime” written for Gayle’s prompt over at Meeting the Bar at dVerse. Come play! 

 

 

 

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16 Responses to Do Re Mi

  1. Misky says:

    Love those two last lines. Lovely.

  2. I’m finding the beauty of an entire poem being outdone time and again but the end couplet, yours no exception, De! Nice!

  3. hypercryptical says:

    The moon has it!
    Anna :o]

  4. Srishti Dutta Chowdhury says:

    This is a very pretty poem.
    Much love (:

  5. Grace says:

    That last couplet is exquisite De ~ Love the crinkle-gather and tumble-crumbled comedy.

  6. radio head says:

    !!!

    “And with a muggle-muddled moan
    I present my own sky: a stone.” … Brilliant ending. “I present my own sky-ass tone” … thus the do re mi (or do Rumi / doe Remy). Hee hee. 🙂

    In other words, you’re mooning the moon!

    I’m completely smitten with this whole gorgeous poem.

  7. Bodhirose says:

    So love this, De, and these lines were so cool: “I crinkle-gather all my wits/about my fractured self in fits,/a tumble-crumbled comedy.” And I love your last couplet with your “muggle-muddled moan.” I’m so glad you were able to make it in time. 🙂

  8. Glenn Buttkus says:

    A fun tirade, rife with clever word-smithing. For some reason (maybe the Muggles) I heard echoes of J.K. Rowling; what giggles & smiles.

  9. She casts her spell; I dance and cry,
    and press her presence to my heart

    One can be taken by the soothing presence of a loved one obviously. Fun take De!

    Hank

  10. I really love how you did this, on the surface a nursery rhyme, bug just like the best it’s filled with layered depth, the moon an the stone are satellites or opposites..

  11. Shawna says:

    Hey, remember Mark? awakenedwords.wordpress.com

    He wants to do a word list again sometime. Just giving you a heads-up.

  12. Love:

    ” through the rumbled sky she flits,
    spinning tales of blue tragedy.

    She’s a wonder-wandering eye,”

    and your closing!

    You made these ending words rock for your poem, de!

  13. sKeYeS oF
    ImaGiNaTioN..
    visibiLiTy
    forEver
    eternAlly
    noW aS Free..
    iN AnGeL WinGs..:)

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