Keep this under your hat, beneath your skin:
let’s begin as smashed hope and promise,
a small smidgen of something sound.
This stopwatch is set to ‘run’ –
maybe we’ll see our turn
and learn a thing or
two, one silenced
way with us,
a shape all its
own, a face and hands.
It stands tall, runs out when
it pleases, throws sand in our
eyes and squeezes them shut as dark
stars. It mars its own skin with squares,
stares into the face of death and laughs deep.
Victoria has us writing Etherees over at dVerse
(I’m late to the party. My hourglass was broken.) Come play!
Absolutely poetic perfection.
time has its way with us …. I could feel time slipping away
Oh yes ❤ time certainly does has its way with us and tends to work in mysterious ways 😀
Such a superb etheree ❤ Beautifully done.
Lots of love,
Time has definitely had its way with us…you managed to do this, not only with syllables but to the letter. Perfect shape.
Enjoyed the wordplay here, and the inspiration you drew from the shape of the poem– not only the literal “hourglass” shape, but how, in stanza 1, you played with the idea of possibilities narrowing as time ran out (the slowing trickle of syllables)
Thanks for sharing 😀
Love the title, smashed hope and promise, shape and form ~ Time indeed has its way with us ~
Good feel for the Victorian wasp-waist hourglass figure fixation; your mastery of the form is terrific, you make it look easy. They say that beyond the veil, time does not exist, the past , present, & future are all there; must be cool.
Oh! Look at that! Very cool indeed! >
I love this.. the shape of time, that perfect shape, yet I feel the cutting edge of its hands… the sand that mars… wonderful
Counting syllables they way time is measured. Very well done!
Time is fleeting indeed! And I agree with Glenn, your mastery of form is terrific, you make it look easy.
I love your style, De…the way you put it out there.This is no exception as time was so empowered in this piece that it almost gave me chills.
So well done, nothing forced, quite brilliant.
SeCreTs iN plaiN
siGhts ALL Around
uS tHey coMe
Very shapely – in all sorts of ways.