“a rising
grapefruit” … Excellent description of the sun.
Oh, how I love what you did with the indentation at the end. “Just like me (please).” Also, “(Be) just, like me.” Or “(Be) just like me.” This reminds me of grade, and high, school. I spent all my time trying to be just like other people, but I always wished someone would like me enough to want to be like me.
I also really like the possibility that you might be asking the sun to like you. Be friends with you. “Just like me; you don’t have to love me.” “Nobody else likes me; will YOU like me?” I could go on and on. That was totally me today; when everything feels off, it’s all gonna be okay as long as I can lay out … which I was able to do today. It was blissful. Not long enough, not alone enough, but blissful.
I also like that the title could be “snail’s tone.”
The snail could be the one asking the sun to be his/her friend. Or the snail could even be the sun … a snail sun. There might be an S/nails/tone in there too. I have NEVER done that. 😛
Excellent title.
“scribble-scrabble” … Excellent verb.
“a rising
grapefruit” … Excellent description of the sun.
Oh, how I love what you did with the indentation at the end. “Just like me (please).” Also, “(Be) just, like me.” Or “(Be) just like me.” This reminds me of grade, and high, school. I spent all my time trying to be just like other people, but I always wished someone would like me enough to want to be like me.
I also really like the possibility that you might be asking the sun to like you. Be friends with you. “Just like me; you don’t have to love me.” “Nobody else likes me; will YOU like me?” I could go on and on. That was totally me today; when everything feels off, it’s all gonna be okay as long as I can lay out … which I was able to do today. It was blissful. Not long enough, not alone enough, but blissful.
I also like that the title could be “snail’s tone.”
The snail could be the one asking the sun to be his/her friend. Or the snail could even be the sun … a snail sun. There might be an S/nails/tone in there too. I have NEVER done that. 😛